I Feel Almost Normal

My life before the gluten-free diet was stressful and emotional. 

I was confused and perplexed by the gradual changes my body had made.
Exhausted from doctor visits, medications, tests, blood work, and more doctor visits with NO answers.

"Something must have changed."
"Let's focus on the kidney stone first."
"We'll do more tests."
"I'm sorry."
"Talk to your other doctor."

Just a few of the comments from my doctors, that left me completely LOST.

I honestly felt no hope. 

And especially from the two doctors I was meeting with almost on a monthly, if not bimonthly basis.

ALL I wanted was my body back the way it used to be.

ALL I wanted was to be myself again around my kids, husband, family, and friends.  To have energy, to not feel a constant sickness.

ALL I wanted was to feel NORMAL.

So here's my story.

It all started a year ago this January.

I started having a monthly annoyance of yeast and bacterial infections on the inside and outside of my body.  These would cause me to feel fatigued, sick, and just not myself.  I could almost time them.  NEVER in my life had I had these.  EVER.  Their solution:  Medication.  Pills.

Then first week in April I sprayed my ankle stepping out of a flower bed in our front yard.  It was bad enough that I needed to be on crutches for several days.  Around the same time, I noticed my joints and muscles ached all the time.  Almost as if I had worked out or used them A LOT.  I almost felt like I was having early arthritis.  I couldn't even cut my kids' fingernails without having my hands ache the WHOLE time. 

That same month, I started feeling weird sensations in my legs and lower back.  A burning, prickly, falling asleep pain.  It was so strange.  Tired, sick to my stomach.  I honestly thought I was loosing my mind or becoming one of those people who think they are sick when they are truly not.  A few days later, I woke up to find a rash on my lower right backside.  I right away sent an image of it to my mom and a close friend of mine.  Both agreed:  Shingles.  A trip to the doctor (which I had been to a few days before FOR the weird sensation--who had suggested I was pregnant), confirmed that it was indeed Shingles.  More medication.  Rest.  Stay away from pregnant women and young children.  REALLY?!?!?!

Early September I had a similar feeling and rash which ended up being a bacterial infection.  Unlike my April rash, this one spread across both sides of my body.  More medication.

Then the beginning of November, on the day our children were being baptized, I woke up with a stinging pain in my lower back.  I was NOT about to cancel or postpone something that we had been waiting for, for a long time.  Four Advil and the busyness of the day, caused the pain to subside.  Just as guests were leaving our house, it came back FULL force.  Enough that I couldn't stop crying.  Both our moms agreed I should be taken to the ER.  The car ride there was horrible.  I honestly felt like I was having Clayton again!!  Between waves of pain, we laughed (lightly).  While in the ER, I went to the bathroom and peed blood.  Pure blood.  I freaked!  I know, I should have been more relaxed...but I had never had something like that happen before and I was not prepared.  More tests, blood work, CT scan, showed it indeed was a kidney stone.  Lovely.  Sent home with a sieve, MORE medication, drink LOTS of fluids, and a hang in there. 

I forgot to mention that prior to the kidney stone, I had a horrible cold and another bought of infections.  In fact, I was ON medication when I went into the ER to help clear up my issues that I had had the week before.  And right after feeling somewhat normal (like I didn't have to use the restroom, right after washing my hands from using it!), I got another cold.

There wasn't a day in those 10 months that I didn't feel fatigued, nausea or sick to my stomach, achy, muscle/joint pain, and downright emotional.

Then, I started researching.

AND taking control of what I had given my doctors.
Control of finding answers to what was wrong with ME.

A friend had mentioned Candida.  Looked it up.  Yep.  That was me.
I remember sending an email to a "help" group online.  As I typed the last 10 months out to this woman, I balled.  I could not stop crying.  I honestly couldn't believe that I had dealt with this for so long and had NO answers.*  She responded back telling me to finish up my antibiotics (which I felt I was on monthly) and seek their herbal supplements.

I stopped drinking pop (it helped that I could only drink water with my kidney stone).
And low and behold, December was the first month (to this day! Yeah!) that I did NOT have any infections.

I also contacted a holistic health woman that a friend suggested.

I called her and was overwhelmed.
Everything she said to me was new.
Unknown.

I met with her once.  Very sweet.  Motherly.  She did a test on me without even asking me about my background or insurance.  The results brought tears to my eyes.  EVERYTHING I had been experiencing, had a name and a reason.  This was just before Christmas.  She also told me I was going to have to go on a radical detox diet.

Nervous and unsure, I postponed meeting with her until the New Year.

In that time, I did more research.  Asked more holistic friends.
Another friend, gave me a name of yet another doctor (this time a chiropractor).

I decided to give him a call.
Why not have a second opinion?

Before even meeting with him to see IF he wanted me as a patient, I had to attend one of his seminars in his office and fill out a three page medical history chart.  They also would do some tests, come up with a "plan," and then IF I had accepted as well, would meet with a financial person to discuss our payment method.

I was dumbfounded but more at ease of the logistics of it all.
He seriously did not start any work on me until THREE weeks after sitting in his seminar.

From day one of meeting him, I felt in sync with his thoughts and techniques (somewhat at least).

More tests were done to find 17 different food sensitivities.  One being Gluten. 

More things were found out of why my body was/is acting up, but I won't go into detail.

Just know, I am taking supplements (more than I thought I ever would!), watching my diet, having adjustments, and thinking differently.

I still have slip-ups with my diet, or days where I remember what it was like before the start of my healing plan.  And it puts things in perspective for me.

I have come a long way. 
More energy, more control, more happiness.
MORE normalcy.

And I still have a long way to go.
But I'm getting there.
And feeling GREAT about this moment.
And the HUGE smile that is on my face.

Because...
I feel almost NORMAL.


*As I type this now, I am smiling a big smile.  Content.  Happy where I am at on my road to getting back to "normal." NOT crying, distraught, puzzled.  Amazing what a few months can bring!

 

Top 10 for the week:
(I will try my best to make this short and sweet!)

10.  Easter Tree.  Starting a few Halloweens ago,  Nana started decorating a tree for each holiday.  Kids enjoyed it and I actually did too.  SO, I decided to make one of our own.  Unfortunately, online I couldn't find one that I liked.  But, I knew Jay's mom had one that I could borrow until then.  Kids loved picking out the decorations at Michael's and then coming home and decorating it!:o) 

9.  Shopping.  Did a few shopping trips on my own this week.  Bliss.  No kids is SO much easier.  So much quicker.  So much more pleasant:o)  Enough said.

8.  Life is good.  As my story above, things are really looking good.  And I've decided to stay home:o)  THREE more years.  There, I said it.  Not I just have to make it official.

7.  Jeans.  I noticed my jeans were starting to become rather big on me.  Went shopping for new ones today.  One pair was a size smaller and the other two sizes smaller.  Shocked.  No pop and eating healthier has caused me to loose 15 pounds without even really trying.  Crazy.  I'm still shocked.

6.  More Cooking/Baking.  Made GF zucchini bread this week--delicious!! My favorite recipe of the week by far!  We also made GF apple crisp and from scratch pancakes for the rest of my family.  I cannot believe how much I am enjoying this.  Seriously.

5.  Friends Over.  Our two favorite family friends came over last night.  The triplets (all three of our younger boys were born within 5 months of each other) were having a ball!  It's amazing they will be TWO this year!  Kids enjoyed themselves, adults enjoyed themselves.  Always a win-win situation.

4.  Malloryisms.  Was a bit grumpy this week...but I still think she's catching up on sleep and recovering from being sick.  One of my favorite moments this week, was when I witnessed her saying Thank-you to another parent because he was holding the door open for her.  She didn't even know I was there...and to see her appreciating help and knowing how to say it to others.  YES!  She also learned about George Washington this week--amazing what a 4 year old remembers!  Still getting dressed by herself, wanting to help more, and even wanting to play by herself more.  Oh and we had a conversation on the way home from the store today (it was just the two of us).  Seems she was to be a doctor and marry her Daddy.  I think it's sweet:o)  You should have seen the smirk on her face.  Daddy's little girl.

3.  Clayisms.  Clay.  Really funny story.  Tuesday, after dropping Mal off at school, Clay and I came home to a pile of dog poop on the playroom floor.  Doors were closed, so I quickly washed fruit (didn't want to contaminate food).  As I was doing this, I noticed Clay had gone into his room, taken about 10 diapers out, and was proceeding to put them in front of the playroom doors.  Obviously, he knew that Tipper needed a DIAPER.  I still laugh out loud thinking about this.  He was so serious and determined to help Tipper out.  Speaking of poops, Clay had a poop mid nap (15 minutes in).  Which you know that is NOT good.  Yeah, he wouldn't go back to sleep.  UGH.  But this week he has said, green, thank-you, fish, table.  AND he was great with our guest over.  NO pushing or hitting.  I think his mommy and me time at the library/PAL are helping!  Thank goodness!

2.  Bible Study.  My bestie from 5th grade and I have been trying our hardest to get a bible study started since like September and we FINALLY did on Wednesday.  So great talking with her.  Even if she's across Lake Michigan.  Looking forward to a weekly meeting with her.  Love you girl.

1.  Date Night.  Jay and I finally had our Valentine's Day dinner out this weekend.  We went to Zazio's downtown.  Fancy dining.  Lovely conversation.  GF menu:o)  It was nice to reconnect and recharge.  Went to Lowe's afterwards to look at carpet.  Love date night.  Love my hubby.

Well, the week has come and gone.
March is Friday!
Crazy fast!
Time.

Enjoy your week.
Thanks for stopping by.
Until next week,
Mrs. Newell